The Beginning of our New Life

This morning, I woke up with so much on my mind that I just gave up trying to sleep. So much on my mind right now and so much going on.

We're supposed to drive up to Virginia today. We're heading over to Knoxville to stay the night with my aunt and uncle and then continue up tomorrow morning to get on the housing list so that I can provide a home for my family. It's VERY scary and if we don't get housing quickly, I don't know what we'll do. With the potential to have LOTS of kids at the house this summer, it will be interesting without a home, but God will provide.

I've got Sarah on my mind and her future. She's so fragile right now. I think yesterday was a big turning point in her life and I hope that she makes the right decision to come stay with us in Virginia. The day that she came and told us that she didn't want to go with us changed my relationship with her. I was so disappointed, but tried to understand her wishes to remain with her dad. Moving is tough on a child at that age. She's my princess and will always be. There are so many opportunities for this beautiful girl in a new state and a new school. I just hope I can re-establish that relationship I once had with her.

I also have Gus on my mind and his future. The mediation 4 days ago went in our favor. The power of prayer is amazing. Just a quick one never hurts. We now have custody of this wonderful child that I have missed with all my heart. He wants to be with his daddy and it's coming together on the positive side for all of us. His brother, Galen, on the other hand, will be remaining with his mother in Indiana. Maybe one day he'll want to be with us, but at this point in his life he has chosen to stay with Mom, and I've granted him his wish. He will be the big brother to his up-coming little sister, and I pray daily that he will do well in the next few years. His mother and I have both agreed to be cordial to each other and keep each other informed of everything that goes on in both boys' lives. I feel very fortunate that she is agreeing to everything, and I honestly wish her the best.

Divorce -- the gift that keeps on giving. The children are the ones that suffer the most and it's so difficult for them to understand.

Today will be my last day at our church. Brother Larry is such an incredible speaker, and unfortunately, it looks like he won't be here today and our marriage counselor will be speaking to us this morning. We've started going to the Family Life Center and listening to Jamie Worley and his band play in the mornings. What a FANTASTIC way to start a worship service. We're so blessed to have some amazing musicians in the church and I will miss them. I just hope that we can find something that compares to this church that has recently changed me and made me think about my future and what it holds for me. I just wish I knew what God was telling me. I'm sure I'll figure it out someday.


~~ Benjamin ~~